Monthly Focus: A Giving Heart

      Hello and good morning everyone, hope you all had a wonderful night. I woke up this morning and my usually oily and bright face felt very dry. I rushed to get ready for work because I kind of slept late due to some extra work I had to do. When I got out of the house to get into my car I discovered why my face felt as dry as it did. The air was filled with thick fog and it only meant one thing, The Harmattan was here to claim it's territory. Well apart from the fog in the air there was something else out there that I noticed, it took me a while to notice but after a while I caught it, it was a scent in the dry breeze. You know that smell of Christmas that gives you the nostalgic feeling of what true Christmas is meant to be like. You know the type that reminds you of how it used to be when you were younger? Yes! Exactly that scent was what I caught in the air. Everyone has been announcing how close Christmas is but it was just this morning I truly felt and perceived the season.


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Spread the lessons in life

In our everyday life, we encounter individual and different situations that live us with their different lessons. Through the mistakes we make everyday and the outcome of those mistakes we are able to learn from our mistakes...or let me re-phrase that, It is totally up to us to either pick up those lessons and learn from them or to abandon them and never learn from them. Admittedly one of the problems with these lessons is recognizing them in the first place. That is one of the issues but the particular issue on life lessons i'll like to discuss today is on what we do with the lessons we learn everyday.

I think one of the mistakes we make in life is to apply the lessons we learn on only one aspect or area of our life. Mostly the area which we learnt the lesson. That isn't enough, we have to learn to spread the lessons on each and every area of our life.

I'll explain better...




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Dear Ralph: Privacy Issues

The DEAR RALPH section of AskRalph blog is dedicated to real people with real life struggles. Ralph deals with everyday life issues from relationship, marriage, self esteem, Insecurities, Family, Parenting Issues, Fitness, Health and many more. Generally when you need advice or a friend to help you through those troubles you are facing in your life you can AskRalph. Feel free to contact me by using the email form you will see when you CLICK THIS LINK  or writing directly to my emails raphaelsblogg@gmail.com or askralphblog@gmail.com if you have an issues you want me to discuss. I would also want to encourage everyone that reads to drop their comments and inputs on the issues. Feel free to object or support any advice I give and drop your own thoughts. It's all in the best interest of the poster and the AskRalph family as a whole. So lend your advice and support through the comments section. It'll be really helpful to the poster. This is one of the main reasons I opened this blog. If you are reading this then I look forward to your participation. Ralph does not....I repeat DOES NOT have all the answers so your opinion counts a lot.... Alright then, let's do this!



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The Dreaded Monday

Hello and Good morning Everyone! How are you all doing this Monday Morning? As i'm sure most of you are feeling down already or tossing and turning in your bed wondering when Mondays will be annihilated I decided to do this post to maybe help you through your hatred for Mondays....Oh and to also let you know that if by the miracle of whoever or whatever, Mondays where somehow to be removed from the calendar, Tuesdays would be the next hated thing to you.

You know the funny thing about the Picture above is that those that actually rise from their beds by 7:35 are the lucky ones. Yeah you heard that right, If you get to sleep till 7:00 a.m and get to work by 8:00 am or an hour later then count your behind as one of the lucky ones because there are people out here who actually have to work more hours than you do, they get up long before you and get home long after you. However we aren't here to compare who has the most time demanding job.

Personally, I believe that you have two choices to make your Mondays good and enjoyable and if you for any reason feel like there is more than 2 reasons then feel free to highlight it in the comments section but before then, read through mine.

The First Choice you have is the choice of your job: There is a saying that concerns Mondays which I believe in. It suggest that Mondays aren't the problem, your job is the problem. I mean just think about it for a minute. Most people think that it's about the pay but I have a friend who is about to quit on a job that is paying him N800,000 monthly because he is worn out. The job demands too much of his time and he hardly has time for his family talk more of himself. He is constantly worn out and it's beginning to tell on his health. Every month he is about 600k (more or less) richer after expenses and still isn't happy. At this point in his life it's not about the money, it's about the convenience. Now I know he might miss that job if he quits and doesn't find something else to do on time but this goes to show you that the dread on Monday and your job isn't just about the Money you are receiving. I believe it's more about the perfect job that suits your lifestyle. I believe if you had a career where you couldn't be bossed around, worked from home and the pay was even less than the figures I've stated above, chances are you will stick to that job for the rest of your life and look forward to every single Monday and every working hour you had to put in.  It's about the career that suits your lifestyle personally.

The Second Choice you have is the choice of choice:  Yeah! you read that right. It's the choice of choice. This is very important and works hand in hand with the first option but can also work on it's own depending on how much you believe in it. What I mean by this is that no matter what you do, you have a choice over your emotions. Life can throw all sorts of situations towards you, as a matter of fact every single day of your life, life is going to throw all sorts of things towards you. I don't know of a single human being who has gone 24 straight hours of his or her life without encountering a challenge or a problem, no matter how minute (minutiae) it might be. However if you never exercise control over your choice of emotions you will find yourself constantly complaining over every single thing that happens in your life or any small challenge you encounter.
      So how does this relate to Mondays? Well its actually very simple, you can wake up today and decide to continue frowning and nagging everyone around you of how quickly the weekend went by, or you can simply decide to put a smile on your face and make a choice not to complain. You can choose to be happy instead and forget that fact that it's Monday at all. You can choose to keep a positive attitude and see today and every other Monday from a new perspective. You can decide to see Mondays as a bad start to your week and stand the chance of ruining the rest of your weeks. You can also decide to see Mondays as a chance at a new beginning. A chance to start over and do things the right way. The choice of choosing is always yours, what you do with it is left up to you. My advice to you however is this...B+ (Be Positive) it'll take you a long way.

I hope you make the right choice today and not only start you Mondays in the right way but every other day. Make a choice today! Choose to be happy this morning and every other Monday morning. Choose not to complain, instead choose to look forward to a productive week....

The stories behind their stories

You feel you understand it all? You feel you know everything about that person you judge constantly? Well just read this and you might just realize that you might have had it wrong all this while. These are some of the stories behind the stories...




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The bad spot

You guys won't believe this but I drafted this post on the 7th of October last year, just 5 days after starting this blog....crazy stuff! Anyways read through. I refused to edit it though so you might see some errors or it might even seem incomplete.


That road that used to be smooth cracks a little and is ignored by everyone including you, the next week while driving you notice that the ground is cracked a little but its just nothing obvious, the crack gets wider as more cars run across it and it expands more, one morning you are going to work taking your normal route and notice cars slowing down at a particular point, they are all cross the point one after the other at a slower pace than they were as at yesterday. In your mind you are thinking to yourself what the issue might be. You say a short prayer to you God hoping that there wasn't a bad accident. Then on getting there you recognize the spot to be the bad spot that had a little crack about a week ago. The thing is, just like every other thing that has been left alone, it has grown the way it likes. It has expanded far wider than you can imagine.
        Months pass by and as you are driving to dinner with your partner or friend of the opposite sex. Almost subconsciously, you pedal down as you get to that bad spot, spin your wheels out of the area of the hole on the ground that is very deep, one tire sinks into the bad spot but is supported and balanced out by the second tire that is still on the good side of the road. Your car slowly dives in but in a couple of seconds, with slow and controlled throttling,  you are out of it. As you climb out of the spot, you zoom off towards your destination. This particular act becomes second nature to you that you don't think of it as you do it, it just happens naturally to you without you taking note of it and on the days you even notice it you stop to think to yourself even praise yourself as a very good driver to be able to avoid those pot holes the way you do. The problem is that as time passes by, the hole still stretches wider and deeper until it covers the good part of the road that supports your second tires each time you cross the bad spot. However you do not notice this until the next time you have to take that route....


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To Forgive or To Forget

    Hey everyone, so I just thought up a little fun game i'll like us to play. It's a simple game of making a simple choice and living with it's consequences. I might bring up more of these in the future if I figure out more interesting ways to do it but for today we are doing "To forgive or to Forget".

As I said it's really simple, all you have to do is pick one over the other but ready the conditions.


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Dear Ralph: Will he fulfill his promise?

The famous DEAR RALPH section of AskRalph blog is dedicated to real people with real life struggles. Ralph deals with everyday life struggles from relationship , marriage , self esteem, Insecurity, Family, Parenting Issues and many more. He deals with generally any trouble you are facing in your life and need a friend or an advice. Feel free to contact me by using the email form you will see when you CLICK THIS LINK  or writing directly to my emails raphaelsblogg@gmail.com or askralphblog@gmail.com if you have an issues you want me to discuss. I would also want to encourage everyone that reads to drop their comments and inputs on the issues. Feel free to object or support any advice I give and drop your own thoughts. It's all in the best interest of the poster and the AskRalph family as a whole. So lend your advice and support through the comments section. It'll be really helpful to the poster. This is one of the main reasons I opened this blog. If you are reading this then I look forward to your participation. Ralph does not....I repeat DOES NOT have all the answers so your opinion counts a lot.... Alright then, let's do this!





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Two Wrongs...

He pushes her on the cotton sheets and she lands with a soft thud as the dun-lop mattress masks the intensity of the fall. He climbs on top her and she hears the sound of her skirt as its ripped from her waist. She thinks about struggling but just lays and stares at him, he pays her no attention. He undoes his trousers fly, slips his stud into her and starts going at it without any intention of giving pleasure, he concentrates only on receiving the pleasure instead.
      She looks away from him in disgust to her right as the force of his movements pushes her body back and forth on the queen sized bed. She closes her eyes and forces the tears that are building up back in, she is tired of struggling with him all the time that this has to happen. She bites the nail on her index finger in anger and looks to the ceiling. He glances over at her and as he maintains his back and fort motion on top of her, he wonders why she isn't putting up a fight today. Sweat drops from his fore head and explodes into tiny and vanish quickly into invisible drops as they impact on her left shoulder one by one. He smiles to himself, in his mind he has won her, he has succeeded in showing her who's stronger. But the thought doesn't last for more than half a second, all he is concentrated on for now is receiving pleasure. He thinks about it for another second, It's been eight years into their marriage and she had stopped fighting, she had learnt how to obey her master. He was proud of himself. He again acknowledges his strength and pumps harder.



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Should your hubby really be your job?

I took the time to pour 2 extra cups of coffee this morning for you guys. So who and who would like to join me this morning. You know what? Let's make this more interesting. Every morning I do a morning coffee session right? Or at least every once in a while. I rant during these sessions but I always have a message I am trying to pass across. So today the first two people to drop comments that are directly relevant to the topic we are discussing this morning would win a shopping coupon from www.dealdey.com. It's worth 3k each.

So are you guys ready to sip this coffee?.... I thought as much! Lol

Let's do this...




During my time out last week and while I was occupied with the external auditors, my mind kept coming back to this blog and you guys that were waiting on me. It was kind of frustrating because I had a lot of work piled up in front of me and I wanted to be done as soon as possible and get back to the blog but at the same time I couldn't afford mistakes while the auditors were around. It then got me thinking of something that I have always believed in.
    You see I have heard people say one particular thing over and over about being happy with your job. They say "Find that thing that makes you happy, that thing you love doing and make it your work then you will never hate your job again". This is a very good advice but honestly I do not believe in this completely. Left for me I would say this... "Find a job, stick to it to feed yourself and your family then look for that thing that makes you happy and have it as a recreational activity". This is strictly my opinion and you are welcome to criticize it but not before I drop my explanation....




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Morning Coffee

           .....Not just your coffee, while you are at it make sure to enjoy every single thing about your life. The people around you, the situations you face. Enjoy the good and the even the bad. It's a crazy world we live in. One day you are here and the next you are gone, a couple of years or decades after that, you are forgotten only to remembered through pictures and a few other memory triggering events or object. I know it sound scary but that's the funny part also. The fact that the world is that crazy, that you can be here this moment and gone the next is the more reason why you should have all the fun you want to. It's the reason why you should cherish this moment right here right now. It's good to plan for the future but don't loose this moment chasing the future that you are not sure of.

So how do you cherish this moment and enjoy your life? By getting your TGIF on of cos. By making sure that this evening, when you are done with work, you set all that aside and go have some fun!




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Time out with Ralph: Ella

Ralph: Hello Ella, Good morning. If you don't mind, I'll like to interview you on this your D.P, you got my BC right?

Ella: Hi, Good morning, Yes I did get the BC.  Feel free to Interview

Ralph: Aaaghhh, My smileys ain't working. Mcheeew

Ella: Lool. You need an update maybe?

Ralph: I hope it's an update not a malfunction

Ella: Loool.  Be positive

Ralph: Lool. I have to be positive if not I'll break this phone

Ella: Lmao =))

Ralph: So I'll like to know your thoughts on this DP you put up...



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Time out with Ralph: Kayode

I'll be kicking off the 'Time out with Ralph' Section today. I haven't concluded on the name yet though *covers face*.

 A couple of days ago, Kayode on my BBM put up this pic above and I asked him to permit me to discuss it with him. Due to some reason or the other we weren't able to do that on the same day but we finally did it this morning. So here is how the discussion went down...



Ralph : Hello and Good morning Kay. I am sure you got my last BC Right? If you don't mind i'll like to know what made you put this up. Is this something you believe in?

Kay: Yeah, It is something I believe in but ladies should still go about it in a subtle way

Ralph: So it's cool for them to make the first move in your books as long as it's subtle right?

Kay: Yeah, Most ladies believed that they should be chased whereas we have a lot of shy guys around

Ralph: It's true, there are lots of shy guys around but what of their usual fear of rejection or being seen as desperate? I feel that the reason ladies shy away from this is because of that fear of rejection or being seen as loose.They feel their intentions could be misread and that the guy could end up treating them as "what they (the men) feels they (the ladies) are"  Or don't you think so?


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I am me...

A must read... But first I need you to answer the question with one word. If you are asked who you are, what is the one word you'll use to describe yourself?



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Morning Coffee

First of all I still haven't concluded on the name to give this so just give me a little time and +thelma enemuwe, +esit  and +Omogbolahan sodiq good job so far with the suggestions. I really appreciate them and they are all really good ideas. If you guys have any more ideas let me know, although I have to admit that the Morning Coffee thing is beginning to stick but for some reason it just doesn't quite suit me. Might just swing with it at the end though....


Let's rant a little


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Dear Ralph: Fuel Scarcity

The famous DEAR RALPH section of AskRalph blog is dedicated to real people with real life struggles. Click the link to 'read more'. Feel free to contact me by using the email form you will see when you CLICK THIS LINK  or writing directly to my emails raphaelsblogg@gmail.com or askralphblog@gmail.com if you have an issues you want me to discuss. I would also want to encourage everyone that reads to drop their comments and inputs on the issue. Feel free to object or support any advice I give and drop your own thoughts. It's all in the best interest of the poster and the AskRalph family as a whole. So lend your advice and support through the comments section. It'll be really helpful to the poster. This is one of the main reasons I opened this blog. If you are reading this then I look forward to your participation. Ralph does not....I repeat DOES NOT have all the answers so your opinion counts a lot.... Alright let's do this!



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Life with no network service

   

   

 Happy Tuesday Morning everyone!

To my readers in Nigeria, how crazy was your yesterday with the whole fuel crisis. It was crazy at my end, banks closed earlier than usual. Some teachers in schools refused to go to school because the transportation was ridiculously high and their low salary wouldn't cover them. This really went a long way to prove to people that at Nigeria's present state, fuel practically controls all the sectors or at least 99% of the sectors. As I was thinking of everything that was happening, a text came in from my internet and mobile network service providers. I had received such messages on my other networks earlier in the day. All 3 of 'em were bearing the same message. They were contacting their customers to inform them that their would be some down time in network for a while until things stabilize in the country. As I read the message, something crossed my mind.

Have you every considered a life without network services?


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Dear Ralph: Insulting Ex boyfriends

The famous DEAR RALPH section of AskRalph blog is dedicated to real people with real life struggles. Click the link to 'read more'. Feel free to contact me by using the email form you will see when you CLICK THIS LINK  or writing directly to my emails raphaelsblogg@gmail.com or askralphblog@gmail.com if you have an issues you want me to discuss. I would also want to encourage everyone that reads to drop their comments and inputs on the issue. Feel free to object or support any advice I give and drop your own thoughts. It's all in the best interest of the poster and the AskRalph family as a whole. So lend your advice and support through the comments section. It'll be really helpful. This is one of the main reasons I opened this blog. If you are reading this then I look forward to your participation. Ralph does not....I repeat DOES NOT have all the answers so your opinion counts a lot.... Alright let's do this!


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Dear Ralph: Do I take the job?

The famous DEAR RALPH section of AskRalph blog is dedicated to real people with real life struggles. Click the link to 'read more'. Feel free to contact me by using the email form you will see when you CLICK THIS LINK  or writing directly to my emails raphaelsblogg@gmail.com or askralphblog@gmail.com if you have an issues you want me to discuss. I would also want to encourage everyone that reads to drop their comments and inputs on the issue. Feel free to object or support any advice I give and drop your own thoughts. It's all in the best interest of the poster and the AskRalph family as a whole. So lend your advice and support through the comments section. It'll be really helpful. This is one of the main reasons I opened this blog. If you are reading this then I look forward to your participation. Ralph does not....I repeat DOES NOT have all the answers so your opinion counts a lot.... Alright let's do this!


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Yes! We struck the Deal!

Yes ooo! Deal really dey!

Hello, Good morning and a happy weekend to you all. How is everyone doing Today? I have to apologize for my absence yesterday.  I attended the burial of a close friend who had been battling with a terrible illness for a while. He was laid to rest yesterday and I had to be there for his family.  We still have a couple of things to do today so I am still going to be absent for today. However I thought to make a little announcement on our next giveaway. Y'all ready?...Of cos you are, it's a giveaway.


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