Time out with Ralph: Ella

Ralph: Hello Ella, Good morning. If you don't mind, I'll like to interview you on this your D.P, you got my BC right?

Ella: Hi, Good morning, Yes I did get the BC.  Feel free to Interview

Ralph: Aaaghhh, My smileys ain't working. Mcheeew

Ella: Lool. You need an update maybe?

Ralph: I hope it's an update not a malfunction

Ella: Loool.  Be positive

Ralph: Lool. I have to be positive if not I'll break this phone

Ella: Lmao =))

Ralph: So I'll like to know your thoughts on this DP you put up...







Ella: It's simple and straight forward isn't it? Your happiness is in your hands. Apart from the gifts of the Holy Spirit that gives you joy from within even in the midst of things that shouldn't even give you joy. The other way to happiness is in you. It's not in someone else because no one can truly make you 'happy'.  Only you knows you and you alone knows what you need to be happy. It's not every time that another person, for example your significant other gets it.
     As humans we are selfish beings, being selfless  is actually going against the norm.  So therefore  everyone should first be interested in making themselves happy before expecting another human who has his or her life to leave his or hers and make u happy. I know it's possible but not all the time.  What of on those occasions that the person or persons can't make you happy,  will you put your happiness on hold until they are available again? That's no way to live and if u can't make yourself happy, how can u make someone else happy?

Ralph: Your points are spot on. And yes, if you can't make yourself to be happy then you will have a hard time making another person happy.  Of cos with children as exceptions  Because those ones need you to make them happy by making silly faces and feeding them when they need it. Lol.
      So I'll like to ask, will you tell people to apply this rule of making themselves the "only" person that can make their-selves happy? Don't you think that there are times when we need each other to be happy? I mean you can't possibly be happy on your own all the time because in a way the part I see as selfishness in a person is the part of of humans that 'uses others to make themselves happy". This is regardless of if the person is using others in a positive or negative way. So what do you think?

Ella: There are times we need each other to be happy yes, especially  in a relationship, marriage etc. But I still stand by that you should first make yourself happy before making anyone else happy because if u don't have joy, you won't be able  to make anyone happy successfully. It would only lead to impatience and annoyance from trying.
       Children are the exception , although they are usually happy already and they even bring joy just by being there *smiles*.
       It is sick to use other people to be happy, the key word here is USE.  Why?  Because if you have to use people to be happy then when u fall into the 'one chance' of someone who would not allow themselves to be used, what will then become of you the user? How do you stay happy?  It's just simple logic like I said. Like before marriage,  be your own person.  Know yourself, know and do what makes you happy before getting married and adding another person to yourself, else you will even loose yourself. Don't get me wrong,  I didn't say make only yourself happy,  I mean START FROM  YOU! It's from your own joy or happiness that you can share or touch others.

Ralph: That's the point I have been looking for. The words on that picture on the D.P you have makes it quite strict. It seemed like it was sending a message that no one should make you happy but you. However saying that you should start from you before moving out to others is different. That's the key right there.

Ella: Yeah

Ralph: Well thanks a lot for this Ella. I appreciate the time you took out for this little chat.

Ella: Anytime.


    There we have it, another successful Time out with Ralph. Ella had her points and very solid ones at that. You should never give the power of your happiness to someone else, instead try to be in charge of that. Let everyone make themselves happy before thinking of others.

 Something she said really got me thinking though, she mentioned that  ".....As humans we are selfish beings, being selfless  is actually going against the norm" meaning that  selfishness is the natural human behavior and selflessness is the abnormal one. Do you believe this is true? Is this the way you also see humans a whole? I personally like to see people in no particular way until they show me who they are. I have never been a fan of generalizing anything especially negative behaviors and traits. So what do you feel?