Dear Ralph: What do I do with my baby now?

The famous DEAR RALPH section of AskRalph blog is dedicated to real people with real life struggles. Feel free to contact me by using the email form you will see when you CLICK THIS LINK  or writing directly to my emails raphaelsblogg@gmail.com or askralphblog@gmail.com. I would also want to encourage everyone that reads to drop their comments and inputs on the issue. Feel free to object or support any advice I give and drop your own thoughts. It's all in the best interest of the poster and the AskRalph family as a whole. So lend your advice and support through the comments section. It'll be really helpful. This is on of the main reasons I opened this blog. If you are reading this then I look forward to your participation. Ralph does not....I repeat DOES NOT have all the answers so your opinion counts a lot.... Alright let's do this!

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Dear Ralph: Should I Sleep with him?

Dear Ralph,
         I am confused,I think I might have come too far already and don't know if I should turn back now. I am 21 years old and have always been praised by friends and family for having a very unique look. From my youth days I was used to being called a model, I have a very good skin, long spotless legs and a long neck. I am not bragging but I know that I am a modelling material. Well it has always been my dream to pursue a career in modelling and I have been working hard on it while balancing my schooling also. Recently I met someone who is a modelling agent or claims to be one because right now I am so confused about if it is true. He told me that he wanted me in his company and I was so delighted, I gave him my contact and we started talking for a while. After some weeks he scheduled a meeting with I and some other girls where we had to come and "show off our assets" according to him. I felt really bad about it but I knew this was the road I had to walk to achieve my dreams. So on that day I dressed up and went to the meeting place where he and two other friends where seated, making it 3 judges.
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November 25th

     November 25th was designated by the United Nations General Assembly as a day to raise awareness for women suffering any kind of violence from domestic violence to rape. This event started 1999 and the date was selected with links to the assassination in 1960  of the three mirabal sisters that where political activists in Dominican Republic. The execution was based on their opposition of the dictatorship of Rafael Trujillo.
     Let us join and support the elimination of violence against women. So put up a pic on your various social medias and show your support.

Click the link to see two more campaign banners.
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Q&A : The Recent child abuse video

Q: Mr Ralph, I am sure you have seen the recent video circulating. You know the one about the abusive helper that brutalized the little girl she was meant to be taking care of. I can't help but to feel bad and sorry for the family. I know what I would have done to the girl if it was me but Ralph I am eager to know your opinion. How do you think that this should have been handled. I heard the girl was beaten up by the Father of the child and she ended up in the hospital seriously damaged. Also heard that she might be facing some jail time. What do you think should have been done and how do you think this should be prevented from happening.

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Dear Ralph: Should we abort the child

Good morning Ralph,
     I have thought about my current situation and a possible way to solve it but I am running out of ideas on what to do. A friend introduced me to your blog and told me of how you helped him so I decided to try you out. My wife and I have been married for 7 years and we have 2 children together, we aren't really financially stable but we manage what we have well and that was why we decided to stop getting pregnant after our second child so that we can take care of our small home well. But something happened mid this year and it has shattered my home.
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Dear Ralph: Please help...

Hello Ralph,
     Where do I begin? I am a 21 year old boy and I have gone through a whole lot that I don't know what else to do. I grew up without a mum and was living with my dad, he did he's best but he just never knew how to connect with me, we fight most of the times because he gets really annoying at times. I don't have any friends and was never really close to any of my siblings. I did have a very close and dear friend back in secondary school and we were really close, he was the only friend I ever had, but we got into a fight one day and after that we stopped talking for a while. We went on break one of the terms and on my return we got a message that he had died from a sickness. You can imagine how I felt, up till today it still haunts me and I think it is the cause of my depression and self seclusion. I am unable to make any friends now, I stay at home and keep to myself. Don't even speak about female friends because I know I will never be able to get a girlfriend with my current condition. I am constantly depressed and with each day that passes I contemplate suicide more and more. I thought that getting into the university was going to help me but I still haven't gotten in. If the problem isn't jamb then the problem would be post UME. I am really tired and fed up and feel like I have no where left to go. I don't know what to do. I feel if I keep going like this that I will do something horrible to myself. I am beginning to be fascinated by the idea of pain and although I haven't done anything to inflict it upon myself I can't say that I haven't thought of it. Please Ralph if there is anything you can do for me I would really appreciate it, I can't keep on going like this. What do I do next? Where do I go?

                                                                                                                                 Anonymous






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Start with forgiveness.

     Learn to forgive. Let go of all the anger and hatred inside of you, if not because of the sake of letting the other person off then do it for your own good. By holding on to grudges and malice you might no realize it but you are preventing yourself form moving on. You might have succeeded in pushing the incident that caused it to the back of your mind but you won't be truly free until you learn to just let go and forgive. Now I know that it isn't easy to forget certain things depending on the magnitude of hurt it caused you but in order for you to proceed with the healing process you would have to learn to just forgive and only then will you get to slowly forget.

But first of all Start with forgiveness...
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Hurtful Words

     Words are as sharp as any knife out there and can cut even deeper because they cut you emotionally. Your choice of words is capable of causing a person some serious emotional problems which could lead to worse consequences.
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Dear Ralph: My man is abusive

Hello Raphael,
            I wanted to know if you could help with something that has been bothering me for some years. I have dated my boyfriend for 3 years now and all through those years I have suffered physical abuse from him. He hits me anytime he gets angry and really roughens me up. I am really tired of all the fights and its affecting me psychologically, I hardly eat these days and it seems its getting worse. The problem is that I love this man and I don't want to loose him because apart from the physical abuse he is really good deep down. He recently proposed to me and I accepted but now I am getting really scared of living the rest of my life with someone that hits me all the time. Please how can I make him stop because I am losing it day by day. Please I want to remain anonymous thank you.


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Loneliness

 

     Have you ever felt like you were in this world alone? Like you are nothing and that nothing you are matters to anybody. Like you are just existing within yourself and unable to break away from that condition.
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Dear Ralph: How do I stop the stutter

Good day Raphael
My name is IBK, I am an avid reader of your blog and I must confess that it has blessed me a great deal. All my life I have know myself to always stutter, I have read a lot about it seeking for solutions all to no avail. I found it pretty difficult in school during seminars and presentations, in short I have been disgraced by stuttering that I have lost count. Please is there remedy or is there anyway you can help me. Thanks so much. God bless.

                                                                                                                                                   IBK


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Stress

   We experience stress in certain points of our life, it's just a natural and physical reaction to situations of danger and any other condition that will get you uncomfortable. It is the body's own way of protecting you. Stress could get you into a state of panic and disorder but when you learn how to manage it you will see that it could also be a good thing cos it can kick your body into a state of high alertness and response. You just need to learn how to recognize it when it is happening, accept it and use it for your own good.

  

  Continue to learn more.....

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Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence has been a popular topic for a long time in our community and seems it isn't loosing its fame. Have you experienced brutality in your home, are you still experiencing it, what did you do to stop it from happening, lets hear your story...