Dear Ralph: How do I stop Envying people

Good morning Ralph
       I have been going through your inspirational write ups and really want you take on the topic envy because that is my biggest problem. But for now I want you to help me out. I have been stagnant in life, I don't seem to achieve anything. Anything I put my hands into flops and I think it's because of my envious nature. If I see another person progressing I start wishing the person bad but I know deep inside that I don't mean it like that. I have tried to consciously stop myself from envying friends and families success but its really bad now. Can you suggest anything at all? I am afraid that at this rate I will end up a failure. Please use anonymous as my name and share the story so you can keep helping others with similar problems. At least let that be one good thing I have done. Thank you Ralph and I hope you get this message.


Good morning anonymous
        Your message was well received and we are going to work through this together so don't worry. All you have to do is grab a bottle of your favorite beer and listen to me.
     First of all you need to detect if actually what you are doing is envying people or creating competition for yourself and thinking that you have flopped because you didn't beat the target you placed. If you are still convinced that it is envy then I would first of all advise you to block everybody else out so you can stop feeling insecure about yourself and abilities as that is a big contributing factor. Most times people who suffer envy of others are insecure about themselves, you need to start believing more in your own abilities. Competing as a challenge for growth is healthy but for now stop competing with others in their own field and discover your own talent so that you can invest in yourself and grow as a person first. By the time you are able to do that you will begin to see that your talents will pay off positively in your pursuit of success and you won't feel the need to hate on others success anymore.
     Do not worry too much my friend, calm down and take everything slow. Trust and believe in yourself. Believe in your talents and if you must compete with others then do it healthily but do not envy it is dangerous. You at least already know inside you that you do not mean bad so start slowly and you will win this your internal fight before you know I promise. Remember also that you already recognized your problem and you are willing to work towards it to make things better and that is a big and bold step that many aren't willing to take so give yourself some credit.

And thanks for the suggestion. I will write on Envy soon enough, your suggestion is very much appreciated.

And ehen! If you haven't finished that bottle of beer by now then you are wrong! LOL. Have a nice day and get back to me with your progress I want to be sure I helped....

                                                                                                                                                Ralph