Relationships aren't for the lonely

Did you know that the energy you bring into a relationship could make or break it?

I strongly believe that one of the mistakes that we make while making the decision of getting into a relationship is doing it because we are lonely. Most people only get into relationships to seek a person to complete them and fill the hole of emptiness they have in their life...note that I didn't say "heart" but their life as a whole. This occurs mostly with people who have just had a recent and possibly bad break up from someone they truly loved. You see it's different when you get into a relationship because your heart needs and is ready to be loved. That, on it's own is dangerous but not as bad as going in because you have a lonely life.


Let me explain better...






Relationships aren't made to make you whole. Love isn't something that makes you who you are. It is an empty space that two people come together to fill up.  That means that you have to have something to offer. That means that you already have to know who you are and be happy as that person to go into a relationship if not you will be taking whatever it is you are at your present state into that relationship. Most likely when you go into a relationship because of loneliness you do it because you have nothing interesting going in your life at that moment. You do it because you are sad and tired of being by yourself and that isn't a very good reason to venture into a relationship. Especially if you plan on having a long lasting relationship that could lead to marriage and not just a fling. You have to learn to be happy on your own before bringing someone else into your life or going into someone else's. The success of your relationship could depend on the energy you bring into a relationship and if you go into one with nothing, hoping for your partner to make you something then you might find that relationship collapsing. If you go into that relationship with nothing but hurt in your heart form the last relationship you had then you will only fill your own portion of that empty space with hurt and sadness. If you go in with loneliness then you are still going to find yourself lonely in that relationship.

There is this thing that feeling of urge does to us. It forces our mind to mistake the lies we tell ourselves for reality when we want something badly. I'm talking of that convincing lie that we tell ourselves simply because we really want to indulge in something. Like that last moment before you cheat (for the first time..lol) or take a bucket of ice cream and break your diet. We tell ourselves all sorts of things in our mind simply to justify what we are about to do but deep inside we know that it is wrong. However reality remains reality and it's only a matter of time till the fog that those lies in our heads placed clears up and we then have to face the truth. This could be harmful to us in the long run. Going into a relationship because of that feeling of loneliness is gong to have the same effect on you. That strong feeling that you need someone in your life simply because you are lonely would push you so hard till you get what you want. Not until after you have gotten it will you realize that you just might have made a mistake. It's just the same thing as wanting just s3x and convincing yourself that you need to be in a relationship when in all actuality you are just feeling horny, nothing more. The truth is that once you get that s3xual satisfaction you are looking for, it gets boring and you are out again. That is exactly the same thing that will happen to you when you get into that relationship out of loneliness.

If you aren't happy single then you won't be happy when you are in a relationship. Happiness starts from you, it is only enhanced by a relationship and not created by it. You need to find yourself first. You need to ask yourself what makes you happy and start doing it. You need to be happy on your own. That is the only way you would be able to stay in a happy and successful relationship. That relationship would only boost the energy you take into it. If you go in with bitterness, hurt and loneliness then you will find that same energy increasing with time in that relationship and you will only succeed in possibly dragging your partner down with that energy, if the person is lucky he/she gets out of the toxic energy that comes with you on time. However, go in with happiness, true happiness that you have already found on your own and you just might have one of the most wonderful experiences that a relationship can give.

Find happiness today by doing the things you love. As I said earlier, it starts from you. What will you be taking into your next relationship? Sadness? Loneliness or are you going to be coming with your own truck load of happiness. You get to choose...