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Wednesday 29 October 2014

Speak Gently to Your partner




    At times the reason why it seems like your partner never wants to consider anything you say and always goes ahead to do what they want to do regardless, is the manner in which it was said. You see in an adult relationship, the partners expect to be treated like what they are; adults. You scream too much and you make the person you are talking to look stupid. Try to take the gentle approach when speaking to you significant other in other to pass your message across.
         Keep reading and let me tell you a little about my personal experience...


      One of my past relationships used to be exactly like this, the lady I used to date back then, although very beautiful and polished never had a way with words,don't get me wrong she had a very good diction but she lacked the manner to go with it. I was young then and still learning a lot about relationships so I got a whole lot of things wrong, she was older than me then and had been in more relationships so was obviously more experienced than I was. She tried her best I must admit to relate to me and on my side I wasn't just getting her message because 80% of the time they where sent across in a wave of screams and verbal abuses. As someone that grew up having to deal with a lot of criticism, I wasn't going to take all that because to me I had already had enough from people and I didn't need it from someone I was dating. Well I guess I caused most of the problems and although she tried her best to correct me, her manner of approach and my stubborn head as at then where just not the best match. Things broke off between us after a while and we really didn't know what had gone wrong. Looking back on it now I am not saying she was entirely at fault, not at all, I just feel that if she just spoke to me and corrected me in a more soothing way, things would have turned out differently.

   Words with the right attitude combined could do a lot for your relationship. Next time you want to blow your top just try to remember that you want to pass a message and not spite your partner. It might not be easy at first to remain calm but you will definitely learn if you keep practicing.

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6 Comments:

At 29 October 2014 at 17:07 , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mostly its men that do this thing...very annoying. mcheeew

 
At 29 October 2014 at 17:08 , Anonymous Anonymous said...

ralph tell your fellow men abeg

 
At 29 October 2014 at 17:10 , Anonymous Olu said...

this really caused a problem in my own relationship also. i like this write up and I love your blog, this is my first time commentin. Good job so far ralph

 
At 29 October 2014 at 17:22 , Anonymous Anonymous said...

its always easier to explain things when calm but not so easy

 
At 29 October 2014 at 17:23 , Anonymous Anonymous said...

it wont be easy to stay calm when what you are saying is that the person should stop cheating everysingle time! over and over again! all the time!

 
At 29 October 2014 at 22:15 , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ralph , I have been in same position as you, I dated someone older but in my case i had to scream before she takes corrections

 

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