Are omissions also lies?

     

Good morning everyone, how's you all doing today. Something actually crossed my mind out of who knows where and I decided to talk about it this morning and of cos as usual get your own opinions on the matter. So the topic is on Lies and Omissions in relationships.

So let's say you're in a relationship now and probably doing something that you know that is wrong or that would cause an issue between you and your partner. It could be something that you both just don't agree on, it mustn't be morally wrong but that isn't an exception either. Very few people are able to keep tackling the issue head on until an understanding or conclusion is reached. While a whole lot of people either fall back to Lies or Omissions. Now I know you all know the meaning but let me still explain a little still.





Lies: This is when you openly tell a lie to your partner for reasons best known to you. Either to protect yourself, the information you refuse to release, deceive your partner into believing something else or protect the relationship form any harm that the truth might cause.


Omissions:  This is when you knowingly leave out an information or a particular detail of an event that might or will put you in trouble in your relationship.

So now let me paint a picture for you guys...


Take for instance, you go out with friends and amongst those friends there is a certain someone that your partner normally wouldn't approve you to go out with.Not like you invited the person to the hang out but the person is there. Now your partner asks how your day was and you simply say "fine". Your partner asks, "did you go anywhere " and you reply with "yes, I went out with friends and it was fun". Your partner asks after your friends that you were to hang out with one by one and you respond. Now your partner didn't ask about that particular friend and so you didn't tell...right? Yet deep inside you, you know that you weren't meant to go anywhere with that person and that it was only right to let your partner know what you did. However since he didn't ask anything, you didn't say anything. So to you, you believe that "you didn't tell a lie"
   Now also picture when mistakenly, something goes wrong and you just somehow happen to sleep with this person that you've been warned against. Your partner still doesn't come out to ask "did you sleep with Mr or Mrs x" so as usual you still won't have to say anything.  So right now, "you still didn't tell a lie" Right? Alright cool. However remember that bringing technicalities into a relationship and trying to play mind games is one of the sneakiest ways to quickly destroy your relationship. Relationships aren't like businesses that you can use technicalities and details of contract to bend the rules in order for them to suit you. Turning your relationship into a game, a mind game can wreck things for you and your partner.

I believe that even though an omission doesn't technically mean a lie, it is still a lie of some sort. It is callled a 'lie of omission'. Now of cos "technically" you didn't come out straight and deceive your partner with the wrong information but I also believe that the fact that you know right from wrong, and still chose to do wrong tells a lot.
           I read a meme online saying that cheating doesn't mean that you went to sleep with someone outside your relationship, that as long as you have found yourself hiding your text messages, then you are already cheating. This is exactly the same thing that applies when it comes to lies of omission. Simply because you left out an information doesn't justify anything.

Another thing about omissions is that even if you do it for the sake of peace, it could lead you into temptation. For example, picture the scenario I painted above about you going out with someone and with time you start having an affair with the person while 'omitting it from conversations'. I strongly believe that it's because you gave room for the so called omissions, that is the reason why with time you have become comfortable with the mind state of "What they don't know wouldn't hurt them". Through that mind state you are now able to do whatever you like with no boundaries while giving yourself the excuse of 'omitting the details'.

The lie of omission starts out as a very little lie that you can classify as not being a lie at all but could lead you into many different things. Always remember that playing games in your relationship is very dangerous. Try to be honest and build trust. Even if you keep fighting with your partner over issues, it's best to fight it out than to destroy trust through lies. A relationship built on lies is just fiction in my own opinion.


Now my question here is this...

To you, whether you are the one being omitted to (if their is such English) or the one doing the omission. Do you consider an omission as a lie? Have you ever done this in your relationship? What would be your reaction if your partner were to do this?