Dear Ralph: She won't kiss me

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Dear Ralph,
       
        I have a little problem that is really embarrassing for me. I don't even know how to handle it or explain why? I have been with my girlfriend for about 3 months now. I love her very much but the problem is that she doesn't let me kiss her. The moment I come close to her she bows her head or looks away. She just makes sure that our lips don't touch. I don't even know how to tell her because it's embarrassing. Please can you help me out with this?



Dopest.











Dear Dopest,

       I know it seems really strange and embarrassing for you but this isn't something that has never happened to any other person. There are ladies and even guys that are like that. The thing is to find out what the reason is for their behavior. The only way to do this however is to ask them so I really think you should try and get over the embarrassment you feel you will experience when you talk to her. Finding out her reason will help you to figure out how to tackle the issue and still maintain a good relationship (depending on if you handle it well). I can give you a couple of reasons why she might be acting like this but ultimately you will still have to talk to her about this.


First of all, it could be a thing of religion, strict upbringing and morals. Maybe she just simply doesn't feel it's right to share a kiss with you. You know the way people like to abstain from s3x at least until they get married? Well, I can tell you from people I have actually met that there are people that take it a little more serious and allow no kind of contact be it touch or kiss before marriage. I know it's kind of severe but there are people like that, you should talk to your girl more and know how religious and social upbringing. This is very important for the both of you.

Secondly it could be because of temptation. To avoid the popular saying of how "clap turns into dance", she might not want to start anything at all with you. At least not until she is sure that she is ready to take the risk of whatever it might lead to. She might simply be trying to abstain from going too far with you (if you know what I mean). Her way of doing this could be by not even giving any kind of chance at all for anything to start.

These are just two reasons why she might be avoiding kissing you. Remember that these are really wild guesses and I might be far from the real reason. The only person that can give you the correct reason is herself. So just try and talk to her okay? Let her know that you are concerned and that it doesn't feel good to be rejected and left in the dark at the same time. Talk to her calmly and show her that you aren't angry but instead you are interested in finding out what the problem could be. Let her confide in you and know that no matter what the reason she might tell you, you won't judge her or make her regret telling you. So just ask and then listen to her with a heart intending to help out.

Everything will be okay between the both of you. Welcome to the family.




Ralph